This is a Stick-Up!

Despite being an educated hip-hop head I do love me some ignorant hip-hop. I've decided to compile a list of my favorite stick-up songs of all-time.Why? Why not? . Now, some of these straight up promote armed robbery while others are cautionary tales. Either way they all bump. Yes, hip-hop can be very irresponsible at times. Very irresponsible. But so can movies. Yes, I'm using the movie excuse (that in itself is a topic for an entirely different post). I'm not gonna attempt to defend these songs (at least the ones that promote robbery) since there really isn't anything to defend. Sure, I can get all sociological on that ass and talk about how these songs describe the lengths to which minorities in economically disadvantaged communities go to in order secure their life chances, but I won't. Just listen to the songs and enjoy.

What follows is a list of my top eight stick-up songs. Why eight? Well, obviously there's plenty more but these are the ones that I find myself digging the most.

8. Edan-Run That Shit!

Memorable line: "I want the ice in the freeza/ give it up skeeza"

Reason: This is the only song on the list that's a parody. And it's pure adulterated genius. Edan runs the gauntlet on his unsuspecting victims--stealing everything from jewelry to a strawberry milkshake. Pure genius.

7. 50 Cent-How to Rob

Memorable Line: "Run up on Timbaland and Missy with the pound/ Like 'you gimme the cash and you put the hot dog down"

Reason: Although this was meant to be more of a publicity stunt than an actual artistic statement, it's still pretty entertaining. 50 isn't taking lyricism to another level on this one, but it's quite clever.

6. Ghostface Killah feat. Raekwon

Memorable Line: "We walked in, both of us looked like terrorists/ masks on, second floor, dunn yo, I handle this"

Reason: This is just Ghost and Rae at their mafioso best. Ghost and Rae spin a tale about a drug robbery gone sour. It's cinematic. Martin Scorsese or Francis Ford Coppola couldn't have created a more vivid scene.

5. Mos Def-Got

Memorable Line: "Cats be living off sheer confidence/like 'fuck that! Picture them telling me run that!'/but acting invincible just ain't sensible"

Reason: This one is a little different. It's not a cautionary tale on the dangers of being a stick-up artists, but on the dangers of flashing too much wealth on the block. Mos definetly drops some nuggets of wisdom on this one.

4.Gang Starr-Just to Get a Rep

Memorable Line: "As we know the things we do come back/ And shorty's now peeping others that are scheming the kind of act"

Reason: The beat. The samples. The lyrics. The message. This one is just a classic.

3. Slick Rick-Children's Story

Memorable Line: "He was only seventeen in a madman's dream/The cops shot the kid, I still hear him scream"

Reason: This is the quintessential stick-up song. Yes, it comes off a little cartoonish now but it still bumps pretty hard.

2. The Notorious B.I.G-Gimme The Loot

Memorable Line: "I wouldn't give a fuck if your pregnant/Gimme the baby rings and a #1 mom pendant"

Reason: This is quite possibly the most irresponsible and ignorant song I've ever heard and I love it! This is pure hyper-masculine, angry hip-hop at its finest.

1. M.O.P-Ante Up

Memorable Line: The entire freakin' song!

Reason: What other song could it have been? This one turns armed robbery, murder, and abduction into one catchy-ass chorus!Fun stuff.

So there you have it, folks.